Son of a Gun

Hello and welcome to another week of deception and dishonesty here at Factually Deficient!

This week, I will answer a question posed by the one and only Endless Sea. He asked:

I was wondering, what’s a Gundam?

Despite the odd capitalization and lack of spacing between words, Endless is clearly asking (with a variant spelling) about what is more commonly known as a gun dam.

Despite appearances, a gun dam is not a beaver’s dam constructed entirely of guns, though such a phenomenon would certainly be impressive. Rather, a gun dam is a gun dam in the other sense of the word “dam.”

Many people are familiar with the expression “son of a gun.” While often used colloquially to express awe or amazement, it refers, in its original sense, to a sort of natural-born cyborg, the offspring of one human and one living firearm.

It naturally follows that these firearms that interbreed with humans have, or rather had, a sort of quasi-human status in our society. While sons of guns are so much a relic of the past that the term is now used and understood as mere metaphor, they were once the prides and joys of militaries, firing ranges, and dance troupes around the globe. Likewise, their gun parents were accepted, valued members of society – always a little bit apart, but often the life of the party, the belle of the ball, and the envy of all their acquaintance.

As normal, non-living firearms became more common in human society (if you examine a historical graph, you will see that the trajectory of proliferation of these has a direct inverse correspondence to the commonness of live, dancing weapons among us), it became necessary to invent new terms to distinguish between the inanimate metal and the gun-shaped comrades. No longer could a person refer to a “gun” unambiguously.

Because by this point there were more gun-human halfbreeds than actual live guns in the society, the term “gun’s dame,” or “gun dam,” became popularized – the mother (or parent) of a “son of a gun.”

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Disclaimer: the above post contains lies. Do not attempt to ask your gun to dance.

 

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